Those who follow me on Instagram (drmeganlowesbolin) know for the last two years I have been traveling to a different parish in my Diocese just about every weekend. A friend of mine did this a number of years ago which inspired me to do this for two reasons: First, I wanted to see and experience the beauty of parishes around the Cleveland area. There are over 185 Catholic Churches and I wanted to experience the architecture, the music, culture and fully immerse myself in the life of the parish. The second reason is I wanted to experience what it is like for a “stranger” to walk through the parish doors for the first time.
I worked full-time in parish ministry for 8 years and during my first role in ministry, some of the duties I had involved working with other parishioners and staff members create opportunities for welcoming new parishioners, as well as helping foster a life of stewardship in which members of the parish community felt connected and called to share their life, talent and treasure to continue to help build up the Kingdom of God in a vibrant community. This was and always will be one of my favorite roles I had working in parish ministry, which has served as a foundation for starting Magis Consulting Group years ago.
I have currently visited 81/185 Catholic Churches in the area. While I still have a ways to go on this journey, I have had a number of interesting experiences, as well as made some interesting observations along the way.
One of these observations is that out of the parishes I have visited so far, at least 1 individual from 5 of the parishes have gone out of their way to say hello to me since they noticed I was a new face. This has included a priest, parishioner or parish staff member. Every time this happened, I not only felt good, but felt noticed and welcomed. In particular, I remember attending Mass at one particular parish where the pastor was sharing in the homily that this was a parish that prided itself on stewardship and welcoming. It was certainly something that the parish took seriously as when I was walking out of the church, the pastor stopped me, asked me name, where I was from and said I was welcomed any time.
On the other hand, I have unfortunately had some not so great experiences when visiting some of the parishes. One common one has been through me unintentionally “sitting where I was not supposed to” during Mass. A joke I had with one of my previous colleagues was how Catholics love to sit in their “assigned seats” and will throw someone out who may be sitting in their pew. I recall one particular parish visit where I was looking for somewhere to sit and noticed a semi empty pew in the back, with one lady sitting at the end. I asked her if she would not mind if I sit by her, whether she lets me into the pew or moves down and I sit at the end. I was fine either way, I just wanted to sit. This particular individual looked at me with a straight face when I asked. I thought she did not hear me right away, so I asked again. She still looked at me with a straight face. Her legs were crossed making it difficult to get into the pew, but somehow I found myself literally jumping over her and getting into the center of the pew. I look at this scenario with both humor but also sadness. I was a guest in the Church but me being me, I took this whole scenario with humor. However, what if I was a guest who was visiting this particular parish not only for the first time, but also returning to the Church for the first time? Would I have stayed? Would I have gotten discouraged and walked away?
There have been many times throughout my years working in ministry in which I have heard the importance of evangelization and being welcoming to those who enter through the doors. At times, it can be assumed that the people who enter the doors are the weekly “Pew People” who may not be strangers to the community. However, how often do people come through the doors on Sunday, where it may be their first time at the particular parish or the first time returning in a while? Sometimes these individuals may be known, or go unnoticed. However, at the same time, does this make a difference? As Christians, we are called to welcome everyone and help them feel welcomed. Through this “undercover” journey I have been on for the last two years my eyes have been opened regarding how sometimes this is the case and sometimes it is not. The good news is that every opportunity is a step forward. Being a welcoming Church starts with us – it cannot be the lone role of the clergy or the staff. Yes, those individuals can support your work and ministry. However, the work in creating a vibrant parish life begins with each of us. One of my favorite prayers is the Stewardship Prayer which goes as follows:
My parish is composed of people like me. I help make it what it is. It will be friendly, if I am. It will be holy, if I am. Its pews will be filled, if I help fill them. It will do great work, if I work. It will be prayerful, if I pray. It will make generous gifts to many causes, if I am a generous giver. It will bring others to worship, if I invite and bring them. It will be a parish of loyalty and love, of fearlessness and faith, of compassion, charity, and mercy, if I, who make it what it is, am filled with these same things. Therefore, with the help of God, I now dedicate myself to the task of being all the things that I want my parish to be. Amen.
Creating vibrant communities of welcomeness begins with us. We each have the power and opportunity to do something, even if it is a small action, to help others feel welcome and included.